Ben's Sketches

Ben Piper

1/9/03

The Whittaker Brothers

 

            The Whittaker brothers (John and Avery) are Siamese twins joined at the spoon. Avery speaks with an obnoxious English accent while John is American, and no matter how much people say that they are merely each holding part of the spoon, they insist that they are indeed Siamese Twins. They also look nothing alike. This sketch would be a mockumentary spoofing Dateline, 60 minutes, or some news show doing a feature on Siamese twins and a tricky operation to separate them. We spend a typical day with the Whittaker brothers to see how hard life is for them. During the course of the day the spoon would change positions in their hand but the brothers would deny that fact and continue to insist that they are twins. There would also be an interview with the twin’s doctor explaining their desire to be separated and how neither one of them is willing to just let go of the spoon. He goes on to explain that though separating them will be difficult he is willing to try the risky operation, though he’s not sure if he can save the spoon.

The sketch ends after the successful operation as the twins leave the hospital. Instead of being separated at the spoon, however, John’s arm has been amputated at the shoulder. Avery is still holding the spoon, but the spoon still has John’s lifeless amputated arm hanging from it. Both twins are overjoyed with the success of the separation and share a touching hug, which is made more comical by the fact that Avery is hugging John with his own amputated arm.